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    Tired of choosing the lesser evil?
    Bored of the whole left and right, democrat and republican party politics?
    You are in luck, for a new party called The Great Old Ones has arrived!
    Their Presidential Candidate, the Great and Powerful Cthulhu, and Vice-Presidential Candidate, Father Dagon, promise to open vistas of terrifying new realities and above all else serve you, the people.*
    Upon their victory those of you who survive will either go mad from the revelations or be on your knees begging for a new dark age!
    Vote for Cthulhu and Dagon now!

    - The preceding advertisement was paid for by the Esoteric Order of The Great Old Ones, and co-funded by the Order of Dagon.
    *With Tartar Sauce and Chips. Mmmm!